Updated: Nov 30, 2021
I don't know about you, but when I see someone walking down the street with a face that says "I feel good about who I am today" I don't really notice their age or size or colouring, I just see the beauty of someone who feels good about themself, and is moving through the world with confidence. I then often notice the way that they are dressed because I'm a "clothie" (Like a foodie only with clothes) I have learnt to appreciate all kinds of people wearing all kinds of fashion as their way of expressing themselves.
I can however be so much harsher on myself. Worrying about what other people might think of the outfits that I wear, and how they emphasise the "good and bad" bits of my body.
I have to say that through the process of doing my Wardrobe Revolution (read my blog posts from July 7th, 2021 onwards) this mindset has changed, and I am far less often concerned with what others might think, because I have taken the time to consider what I like to wear, how it makes me feel, the colours and shapes and design styles that I like and that help me to feel the best about who I am, which in turn makes me a more caring person towards others.
Now how can we have summer clothing confidence? Many people already have this, but for those of us who struggle, here are my thoughts.
Crash diet? I would never suggest this as a way to gain clothing confidence or any kind of confidence. After many years of experience I would say that pinning your self worth on the size or weight of your body is like sailing on the high seas. Sometimes you are going along smoothly, sometimes you are peaking high on the crest of a 10mt wave and sometimes you are crashing down into the dark depths.
As I write this I am feeling in my body the the yuckiness of sugar withdrawal, as I am doing a healthy heart weight loss program. This is about having a healthy body that can take me into my older years well rather than trying to get skinny for summer. I have some health issues that I need to get sorted now before they become a real concern. Being healthy physically, mentally and spiritually is the most important part of becoming your best confident self.
I think the secret to having summer clothing confidence is to look at all the summer styles, pick out the ones that you love and work out the ways that you wear them best.
Do you love strappy styles but like to hide your upper arms? Wear a T-shirt or blouse under a strappy dress. Fancy things up a bit with a puffed sleeve or flowy butterfly sleeve.
Do you like a mini skirt but like to cover your legs? Put some soft cotton or linen pants under the skirt. You could play with lengths like wearing 3/4 pants under a really short mini, or wearing full length pants under a knee length skirt.
Do you like a deep V neckline, but don't want your bust exposed too much? Wear a singlet or camisole underneath. Dress it up with something lacy or beaded underneath or be a bit dramatic with a skin tone singlet, giving the impression of exposed skin with modesty.
Maybe you have a small bust and larger hips. Wear all the strappy things that fall loosely from the bustline. Or a large bust and a tiny butt, wear the short skirt or shorts with a softly fitted top.
Consider colours, and fabric types. Natural fabrics like cotton, linen and bamboo will be cooler and allow air to circulate. They are the best to wear in summer, especially if you are going for a layered look.
Swimmers! You can't hide much in a pair of swimmers. It is a great time to learn to embrace your body, and have some cute cover up garments to wear over the top. Personally I love water and especially the beach more than I am concerned with what I look like in swimwear. I am not going to deny myself the joy and healing that swimming brings me because of how I look in a bathing suit, however I do like to have something cute to throw over my swimmers when I am not in the water, for modesty and for sun protection.
I guess It is all about self exploration in the area of your clothing choices, I am learning more and more to take notice of what I am wearing and how it makes me feel. Sometimes I dress to suit my current mood, and sometimes I dress to lift my mood, and sometimes I still want to wear that soft black onesie made of minky that I talked about last week!
Can I encourage you this week, as well as working on your own summer outfit choices, to begin to look for the aspects of other peoples outfits that you can compliment them on. For example:
"I really like that colour on you it makes your eyes shine"
"That dress is so fun, it makes me smile"
"I love the way you are layering things up there, so interesting"
"Great pants, they are the perfect length and sit so well on you"
"sweet sleeves, they sit so beautifully on you"
Look for something to compliment and then add the reason why you are complimenting it. It needs to be genuine. This will help that person feel good about themself and you will also feel good for making them feel good. Let's up the level of being our best confident person, by helping the people around us to also feel like their best confident person.
Who can you compliment today?
Thank you for reading, I appreciate you.
P.S. All being well with the weather I will be back at the Handmade in the Hunter Markets on Sunday 28th December 2021 from 9am - 3pm. Pop out and say hello!